Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Bitch Fest











Well Summer has been full of surprises.


First I worked for a long time to get ready for our big camping trip. I was so excited to go. Although I am not big on the dirt I love love love the scenery. It is so beautiful and peaceful and the moments (even though they are small) I find of serenity keep me going for a long time. Unfortunately our vacation got cut short because my SIL got sick and we found out she had a brain tumor. So we had to come home.
It has been an emotional roller coaster since then. One minute she is getting the operation, next she is not. They said the insurance needed to be approved and sent her home. She got approved for one but is still waiting for the other. In the mean time my poor MIL is my SILs shadow. She is so worried that she will have another seizure and hit her head. So she is with her, right next to her all the time.
So anyway with all this going on I got really depressed. Mostly because of selfish reasons. First I was bummed that our vacation, (my only one this summer) was cut so short. I know it was unavoidable but Iwas still bummed for me and my boys who basically held on to this trip the whole second half of the school year. It is what got them through. They were so good and understanding about comming home early but I really felt horrible. Charles is going to try to get them up there a couple more times this summer for some small fishing trips. So Emmy and I won't be going. Which sucks cuz I need to get away. I also got bummed cuz we cancelled a weekend we had planned to meet friends in Palm Springs. So another thing I don't get to do.
It is really really hard to keep 3 kids happy all summer on a tight budget and limited resources. Plus we really cannot plan anything until we know what is going on with my sister in law and when she is stable. So I am kinda stuck. I have done play dates, parks, picnics, Chuck E Cheese etc. But I just want to get away. Plus Charles isn't around as much. His company made him lay off his two merchandisers and they also layed of 3 other sales representatives. So he has been working a lot more. And when he is off he is at his moms. So I am trapped here.
So I wait out another long boring monotonous day hoping something will pop up that will excite me or give me something to look forward to. I can only hope for an end to this torture.


3 comments:

Anonymous said...

First, your kids are beautiful. I can't believe how big Emmy looks in the pics.. And her hair is getting so long...

I'm so sorry your trip got cut short. I know it was because of the situation but I can understand how it still sucks. Wish we were closer because I'm stuck inside with the 2 kids and we'd love some company!!!! Hang in there honey, hopefully the summer goes by really fast. xoxo

Jen said...

You're NOT selfish for feeling like you do. It's totally normal. I'm just so sorry for the whole situation.

The pics are gorgeous!

Lotsa of love mama.

Anonymous said...

I'm with Dena. If I was close, Kyndal and I would be on our way! I've been stuck inside the house since school ended - June 6th - and I can't do anything. We only have one car running now and DH drives it to work everyday. I feel like I'm house arrest sometimes and it's all I can do not to scream. The kids have been begging to go to the pool, but since we can't go in the mornings anymore like we used to because I don't have the car to take them. Last summer we were still in the apt, so it was on property. I need a change of pace myself. Sorry about your trip. Looking forward to ours at the end of the month. It won't be anything spectacular, but at least I'm getting away from this house!